Thoughts From a Reader
Anorexia is a terrible mental disease that seeks to destroy and separate families. First and foremost, I pray that your family will be filled with the patience and understanding needed to be able to cope with a problem of this size. I suggest that if you are not attending a good church, that you find one and join it, so that you may be strengthened and supported through the times of trouble.
These tips for dealing with anorexia, are things that I have learned through the years from my first hand experience. They are pieces of advice which you may choose to use or may discard. Please do not place this information above that of the medical practitioner that is dealing with the problem. We are in now way responsible for the consequences of your using or not using these tips.
Having been so closely affected by anorexia, some people may ask why I still promote weight loss through this site. I do hate dieting where it comes to anorexics trying to kill themselves though excessive weight loss. There is a huge necessity for people to remain healthy and to look after their bodies. Many people are overweight and do need to reduce weight. Obesity is as big a problem as anorexia is, and so needs to be counteracted. Also there will always be anorexics looking for new diets and hopefully they will stumble upon this site which we pray will help them to overcome their obsession with weight and return them to normal.
Anorexia is a form of rebellion. Rebellion always comes from rejection that has occurred somewhere. First and foremost in dealing with anorexia, you have to try and identify where the rejection occurred that has caused this rebellion. This rejection could be something as mild as a child at school having called your child fat or porky or any other name that children often use innocently. The rejection could also come from the child feeling unloved etc.
Anorexia is a form of attention seeking. Anorexics are extremely selfish people who think that the world must exist around them. Treat the anorexic with love and care, but never ever allow the dieting or not eating to alter the way that you show them attention. If you show them more attention while they are not eating, they subconsciously realize this and start to use the not eating to attract more attention. They crave attention. Rather just show them constant love, whether they are eating or not.
Anorexics will turn around whatever you say to them, to suit themselves. A neutral statement such as “You look good today” will become “You have picked up weight and are getting fat!” Avoid any statements or comments that can be in any way faintly associated with their looks or weight.
The anorexic is looking for support. Often they feel that the only thing that they are good at is losing weight and will continue with their weight loss efforts to be able to have some selfworth. Whilst they are losing weight, they feel that they are in control of themselves and everything else. It gives them power over others who are begging them to stop dieting. You need to show them support and encourage them in anything that they do. Give them due praise where it is due. Try to encourage other interests that will keep their minds busy and away from their own weight problems. It is a good idea to try and get them to join and get involved in a good local church where they will be kept busy and slowly their minds will turn away from themselves and onto God.
This is controversial. Encourage them to diet! You are the enemy who wants to take their dieting and control away from them. However, once you encourage them to diet, you now become a friend who sees their problem. A problem that no one else is able to see. By encouraging them to go on a good diet, you are now in a position of power over them. Being their friend and being on their side, you gain their confidence. However, what they do not realise is that any diet that is of any good, will cause fat peole to lose weight but will cause an anorexic to gain weight. You begin to fight fire with fire. If they have joined a local church, then I would strongly suggest that you get the weight loss program “God’s way to weight Loss”. This program will build into them many beliefs that will remove their own self sabotaging beliefs, and will quickly pave the way to defeating the anorexic within them.
You must realise that anorexia is in the mind and the mind is extremely powerful. To successfully treat and defeat anorexia you have to get into their minds and alter their perceptions. An anorexic considers themselves to be fat and to be far bigger than they actually are. Never challenge them on this fact, but rather slowly manipulate this perception that they have. They are quite capable of seeing others accurately, but when they look at themselves in the mirror, they see a magnified image and they believe in the magnified image that they see. No matter what you may say to them, they will see themselves as being many sizes bigger than they actually are. This can only be changed through the renewing of the mind.
In dealing with an anorexic, there are many things that may need to change in your own self, to be able to make you able to effectively deal with them. You need to become all of the following , Loving, Full of Joy, Full of Peace, longsuffering , kind, good, gentle and under control. These qualities are needed in treating the anorexic. All of these qualities are what are known as the fruits of the spirit.
Always bear in mind that you can never force them to quit their anorexic ways. You can force them to eat, which will cause more rebellion in hem and will just cause them to become bulimic, which they probably already are. The only way for an anorexic or bulimic to be cured is for them to want to be cured. They will eventually return to semi-normal, but most will never let go of their weight totally. Weight will always be a major thing in their lives, which is not really a problem as long as the obsession with weight characteristic of the anorexic or bulimic is removed.
I pray that you will have total success in overcoming and defeating the disease that seeks to control and destroy your family.
THOUGHTS FROM A READER - WHAT DO YOU THINK?
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